It just dawned on me that I didn't blog about the Chicago trip in June.
THAT must be remedied soon.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Saturday, September 19, 2009
634
It happened again. 187 tweets after the first shout-out last Sunday.
That boy started my week OUT with a bang and ENDED it with a bigger bang!!
Thank you, Donnie!! Love you, ya freakin' freak! xoxo
That boy started my week OUT with a bang and ENDED it with a bigger bang!!
Thank you, Donnie!! Love you, ya freakin' freak! xoxo
Friday, September 18, 2009
The Dark Place
April 16, 1994
The drive to Kansas City from Des Moines felt like it took only a few minutes, but in reality, we left town at 3am, only to arrive at Memorial Hall around 7. We circled the arena and were hell bent on being able to meet our favorite band, New Kids on the Block. Having not been to a show in almost 3 years, we went off what we knew: the location and our determination.
When we arrived, there wasn't a soul to be found near this tiny venue. Having sold out stadiums & huge arenas, we were shocked at the size of this tiny auditorium, but encouraged that maybe it would just be more intimate....like an MTV-Unplugged show. We were a bit perplexed at the lack of equipment trucks and the absence of tour buses, but it was still early, afterall.
We decided to kill some time shopping and eventually made our way back to the arena around 4. Finally the trucks had arrived and had been setting up for some time it seemed. A few handfuls of girls waited around by the doors & on the front steps of the arena. There were a few girls talking to someone who I later found out was the choreographer for the tour. We talked to him for a few minutes ourselves. We wandered around a bit, hoping for a glimpse...some scrap of evidence that our boys were there, but other than seeing a woman someone said was Danny's girlfriend, we didn't see much.
Hours went by and we finally filed into the auditorium. If you could even call it that. It was more like a converted high school gymnasium. There *may* have been 1,500 people there. We'd gotten the last seats for the show, which were in the VERY back row. We could literally sit on the back of our chairs and rest against the outer walls of the auditorium.
But we were THERE, dammit! We were seeing our boys in just a few minutes! I don't honestly remember who opened the show, or if anyone opened the show. We were too anxious to see the guys. Finally, the lights went down...and the curtain went up...
....oh my GOD!!!
We squealed and screamed and shouted and hollered with everyone else in the auditorium. We scrambled to find who was standing where so we could zero in on our favorite (at the time, we were both Jon girls). Mic stand! Mic stand! Mic stand! Mic stand! Mic st...wait. No...1, 2, 3, 4.....
Joey.
Danny.
Donnie.
Jordan.
What. The. F*ck?
We scanned again and again, finally looking at each other with tears in our eyes. Where the hell is Jon? We went from ecstatic to stoic in a split second. We slid from the backs of our chairs into them and sat there with our heads in our hands. What happened??
This isn't New Kids on the Block! There's only FOUR mic stands. There's FIVE members!
I couldn't tell you what was sung that night or what was said. I only remember what the guys looked like because it was what everybody wore those days: flannel. All I remember was the heartache of knowing that our boy band was missing a member. OUR member. Jordan finally explained later that Jon had fallen off his horse, Shakespeare, and was recovering. He was fine, but wasn't able to perform at that time. We were crushed. I wish I could tell you that the show went on and it was wonderful, but I can't. It was horrible. The sound was bad, the songs were iffy, at best. But I can't tell you if that had more to do with the group or its missing member.
By 1994, Bop and Teen Beat weren't covering stories on New Kids anymore, so we hadn't heard a thing. Internet was still a thing of the future so we had no way of knowing what had happened or what was to come. We were totally in the dark, but we knew one thing. It would never be the same as what it was. We were twenty now and not only did this whole thing signify the end of our favorite group, we knew it closed the door on our youth. It was a bitter pill to swallow.
We drove home that night, depressed and heartbroken. For years, we blocked this out of our heads and tried to only remember when the group was at its best. I couldn't even listen to "Face the Music" because it was such a raw memory for me. To this day, I still refer to this as "The Dark Place."
September 18, 2009
It's been over fifteen years since that door was closed. It's since been reopened, but today, there's a shadow on the happiness this last year has brought us. Thanks to an overzealous fan and perhaps the same things that drove Jon away in 1994, we're missing a brother again. Jon's Twitter account is empty and his tweets have all been deleted. There's only his picture and a message that says "Be back soon." My heart is breaking. Not because of selfish reasons this time, though...but because I know how much Jon enjoys being around us and how very much he must be hurting in order to have done this a second time.
My friends have laughed at me whenever a tour ends and I sit in a corner rocking back and forth repeating "No Dark Place!" like a mantra. They don't understand...I've been through this before. I know what four mic stands on a stage looks like and I never want to be there again. Ever.
With a cruise & rumors (Thank you, Donnie) of a 2010 summer tour only time will tell, if Jon comes back, but for now, if you need me, I'll be in the corner rocking back and forth.
Monday, September 14, 2009
447
Four-hundred-forty-seven.
That's the number of tweets I sent to @donniewahlberg before he responded to me, tonight.
And apparently pornographic thoughts are what motivate the man. This is my message that he responded to:
The video he's talking about is the one I submitted for a contest he's doing to fly a fan out to be an "assistant" for his alter-ego, Tony Spallelli. We had to keep our submission under 3o seconds, so I had to edit down my video, but I did share with him the whole video, too.
My 30-second submission:
Find more videos like this on The Lab
The full video:
Yep...the DH may be an ass today, but Wahlberg came through for me. Thanks D-Dub.
That's the number of tweets I sent to @donniewahlberg before he responded to me, tonight.
And apparently pornographic thoughts are what motivate the man. This is my message that he responded to:
The video he's talking about is the one I submitted for a contest he's doing to fly a fan out to be an "assistant" for his alter-ego, Tony Spallelli. We had to keep our submission under 3o seconds, so I had to edit down my video, but I did share with him the whole video, too.
My 30-second submission:
Find more videos like this on The Lab
The full video:
Yep...the DH may be an ass today, but Wahlberg came through for me. Thanks D-Dub.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Full Service Tour - Summer 2009 (aka "Tits & Wits Tour")
Where do I begin? (Part 1)
There's so much I want to say about my trip to Denver, Dallas & Houston I can't even think of where to begin.
I'm overwhelmed with great memories, hilarious stories, personal realizations and emotional moments. Everything just runs altogether and I can't seem to split it out into plausible thought.
I guess I'll start with THANK YOU...to RiceChex, criSILLYus, Michele and all the rest of my Blockhead sisters who made this week such a remarkable trip. You all made this trip possible in SO many ways. I will be grateful forever for the part you've played in my life.
RiceChex and I started out our trip bright and early Monday morning, July 13th. We left my house about 5:30ish and after a stop at Stahbucks, we were on our way!
We played the license plate game the entire trip and really, it went by quickly. We searched for tumbleweed, but much to our disappointment, it was all still in the field. We made record time, though and surprised criSILLYus by rolling into town about two hours earlier than we thought we would. We did some catching up, filling Silly in on the craziness that has become our lives (for which she was QUICKLY on board!). She made us some quick dinner (Yummy pot roast & mashed potatoes!) and we decided to head toward downtown Denver for some tour bus recon.
It actually didn't take us long. Ole EagleEyes in the backseat (RiceChex) found them within about two blocks. I could go into long, lengthy details here, but suffice it to say, we found their hotel within about 30 mins of intel & recon work. Or so we thought.
We'd already made the decision to stay at the Hotel Monaco, where we saw the crew entering & leaving. Then Jon twitpic'd a photo of some chocolates the hotel had sent to his room. Silly, having the memory of an elephant (only person I know with a better memory than me), recognized the background of the room and with closer looking at the emblem on the placard on Jon's chocolate tray, we diagnosed that it wasn't the Hotel Monaco they were staying at, but the Brown Palace Hotel (one of the most historic hotels in the nation, btw). Well this certainly put a crimp in things! Two hotels. One reservation at the wrong hotel! What to do?!?
Book a room at the Brown Palace, of course. Hey..I just threw the idea out there, RiceChex was the one who ran with it!! Ok..so this MIGHT be proof of our insanity (I know, big word I don't understand)
So we laze around a bit Tuesday morning and Silly, being the perfect hostess, makes us breakfast while we get our stuff together. After a stop for a mani/pedi, some last minute shopping at Target and some lunch at Corner Bakery on the Mall downtown, we head to the Brown Palace to get checked in. We get the LAST available room (we rock...and we manage to resist making fun of the poor saps outside who didn't get rooms) and haul our stuff up to the 7th floor, all the while, anxious and jumpy that at any moment a stray New Kid may pop out of nowhere. We settle in and then have to leave again because my hair appointment is at 4. So, armed with just our purses, we head back downstairs. Rounding the corner toward the parking lot where we've left Silly's car, I stop mid-stride and smother a gasp.
Who's sitting there with his back to us while he texts on his BB and puffs on a ciggie?
Jonathan.
Fucking.
Knight.
(insert internal fan girl squeals here...my composure was actually completely maintained in person.)
Talk about popping up out of NOWHERE! ACK! I spin around and look at RiceChex...all I have to say is "Umm...hon??" and she's ready to fly back inside. I honestly can't confirm that she breathed at all during the following exchange. Nonchalantly, I call his name...
"Jonathan?"
He turns around all squinty eyed..."Heyyy"
"Can we bug you for a couple minutes?" I ask tenatively, but again...quite composed. You'd have been SO impressed!
He rubs his face and says "Awww, man, I just got up a couple minutes ago, can you give me a few?"
(Oh sweet Jesus, the man just rolled out of bed....PG thoughts. PG thoughts. PG thoughts!!!!)
"Sure..not a problem..thank you anyway!!" I manage to mutter before we casually stroll down the sidewalk and around the corner.
This is where the tears and the excitement set in. WE. JUST. TALKED. to JONATHAN EFFING KNIGHT! Mr. Elusive!! Mr. Can't Be Bothered! Mr. I'll Never Come Off This Damn Bus! from the fall and spring tours. OH. MY. GOD!
Breathe.
Breathing is good, here.
So, while we make a couple quick texts to friends, we try to regain the composure we just blew all to hell around the corner. A few minutes later, we come back around the corner, but he's gone.
Damn, he's good.
On a mission, we skip off to the car and head to my hair appointment, where we relay our story to at least two other people, who either A) are as excited as we are or B) fake it really well.
They Turned the Gay Light on for Us! (Part 2)
So, Todd, who I might add is a fucking genius, whips my hair into shape.
Before:
After:
Honestly, I didn't know what to expect when I went in, but WOW..I was *SO* pleased with the results!!! (btw..for those of you in the Denver area: www.hairbytodd.com CALL the boy and make your appointment. You won't be disappointed!! For those of you NOT in the Denver area...take a vacation - he's SO worth it!)
So anyway....we make plans with Todd for him to join us later for dinner & karaoke and we part ways. Back to the hotel we go. The Brown Palace, that is. We still haven't checked into the Moraco. We are fortunate enough to find a meter outside the front door and we plug some change into it before heading across the street.
Walking up, I recognize Jason outside having a smoke. For those who don't know, Jason is Donnie's manager/assistant. I met him in Chicago in June and he was there for my Team Wahlberg girls in Holmdel earlier in the month. He's the sweetest guy and someone I am in serious crush with. Lovelovelove Jason. So I stop by and say hi...we chat for a couple minutes about some of the other peeps he's managing and we head inside to get ready for dinner. A quick sweep of the lobby while we wait for the elevators determines that our boys are still MIA.
We head upstairs, change clothes, fix hair & makeup and we're off again!
Hamburger Mary's for dinner. FABULOUS place...they even turned the Gay Light on for us: (Hey..I'm not being discriminatory...the waiter said it first!)
RiceChex & Me in front of Marilyn on the patio at HM's:
RiceChex having sucked back a cocktail or two (Silly's mom is in the background):
We dodge random rain showers and finally retreat under a giant umbrella right before our meal comes. We manage to eat at least some of our enormous sandwiches (seriously...they're taller than our glasses!). Bloated and belchy, we head across the street to JR's, a karaoke bar.
Silly's friend Adam is spinning tunes, so we pick a table close to the booth and saddle up with some cocktails. My friends @honeymolasses & @tdotcaramel join us (they just flew in from Toronto that night for the concert). We chat a bit about our boys & tomorrow's show. It was cool to finally have met them after having talked on Twitter so long.
I finally get around to picking karaoke music...I choose a couple of songs from the book - a Wynonna tune that's good for a warm-up and my favorite Cher song ever, the Shoop Shoop song. Of course, it doesn't dawn on me until my name is called for the second song that me singing Cher in a gay bar is like getting up at the Apollo. I asked Silly about it. She said "You'll be fine...they won't boo you. Just don't fuck it up." Gee? Ya think?!! No pressure. I do manage not only to NOT get booed off the stage, I got applause after the song AND even a few whoops & hollers DURING the song. Guess I don't suck as bad as I thought! LOL
Bitter, bitter, bitter, bitter, BITTER! (Part 3)
The night progresses and we decide we've had enough fun for one night. Besides...there's stalking to do!!! We say our goodbyes and we head back to the hotel (again..the Brown Palace..not the Moraco...we never did check in. Let's be honest. Who's had time?!). We change from our super-cute dresses into more casual wear and head to the hotel lobby, which surprisingly, for housing an entire boy band, their families, the band and dancers, is entirely EMPTY. (There are a couple handfuls of groupies outside, but the lobby itself is bare.) I've got my laptop, RiceChex has her iTouch and Silly's armed with her phone. I have Jon's scrapbook that I worked on all weekend, Donnie's "Team Wahlberg" wifebeater and handkerchiefs that I've crafted up for the guys and the band for Houston (the final show of the tour on Saturday).
Shortly after getting downstairs, I see Jason come in and I decide he's probably the best bet for getting Donnie's gift to him, so I head over to say hi. I joke that he's following me and it's starting to creep me out. He just chuckles. I ask him if he can do me a favor and give Donnie my gift. He says he will...he takes the bag and he heads outside. Whew...one gift down!
We sit there forever...I'm tapping along happily on my laptop, RiceChex's tuned out with her ear buds in and Silly's playing on her phone. Every door that opens, every elevator ding, every movement that seems remotely out of place has my attention. Even Silly is laughing at my ability to continue typing on the laptop but glance at whatever happens around me without skipping a beat. (hey..we told her we have this stalking shit down to an art. She doesn't believe us.) I see Jason a couple more times coming and going. During one of his trips, I craftily run over to see what floor he gets off on. (Told you I'm good.) By now, it's after 2:30 and my enthusiasm is waning. Jordan's tweeted a dozen times about trying to work the AC in his room. Donnie's given his Yoda-like wisdom for the day and I'm just about over this whole thing.
Finally, the elevator dings and we hit paydirt.
The doors open and Jon steps out (wearing the same blue shirt & jeans he had on earlier in the day). I snap my fingers at RiceChex(who's snuggled down in the chair and doesn't catch the new development...slacker!) and I stand up, calling out his name as I grab his album and make my way toward the door. By the time I get around the glass partition, he's in the revolving door giving me a "WTF" look. I motion for him to come here and he smiles (gah!) and holds up his finger as if to say "gimme a minute." I nod and smile back.
I'm. A. Mess.
My feet are bouncing, I'm tapping my fingernails on the table, my stomach is in knots and I can't seem to calm down.
Five minutes go by.
Ten.
Fifteen.
Seriously?? Did the bastard find a back entrance or did the crazies outside kidnap him?!
Twenty.
You've GOT to be kidding me...
FINALLY...25 minutes later, I see the revolving doors kick on and he comes spinning in, focused on his phone. I call out his name again as I fly out of my chair and head toward the elevator, where he's headed with his album in my hands. He hops on the first empty elevator (both are sitting wide open waiting for passengers). The doors are closing as I reach them and I call out "Jon!! I have a gift for you!!" Of course, in my head, I picture his hand coming out to stop the elevator doors from closing, his magical smile appearing and him saying "Oh yeah? Well c'meah...whatcha got?" There's hugging...conversations about the pictures in the book and we spend a good twenty minutes discussing his frustrations about tour, how glad he is to be almost done with it. There, of course, are more hugs and pictures and our night ends on an amazing note.
To say that's NOT how it happened is an understatement.
No hand appears. There's no funny anecdotes being shared, no hugs, no pictures and certainly no amazing notes.
Just a sour one.
As the door closes, three thoughts instantly come to my mind:
1) Flinging the picture album in the elevator and hearing an "Oww!!" as the elevator dings closed.
2) Jumping on the other elevator and following Mr. Knight up to his floor and hopefully at least being able to give him the book without him calling Armando or Earl to throw me over the balcony first.
3) Standing there paralyzed, broken-hearted and seriously disgusted by my second blow-off from Jon Knight in less than 12 hours (and the sixth in less than a year).
You can guess which one I chose.
Dejected, I stand there, watching the arrow point to each floor as he ascends and heads off to his safe little world upstairs.
I won't cry.
I won't cry.
I won't cry.
*sniffle*
I turned around and walked slowly back to the table. Honestly, I don't remember what was said amongst the three of us at this point. I just know we were all feeling seriously dejected. Silly retired to bed a few minutes later and I finished up a conversation on Yahoo, relaying what just happened to @twistedmacsista, who'd been on pins & needles waiting for the conclusion to our great hotel escapades.
I check Twitter a few times to see if I missed anything. A goodnight from Jason, Jordan & Fish. Hmm...guess everybody's going to bed. We might as well...
*ding*
My head jerks up...
Fish!
Okay..so it's not Jon, but at this point, I think I'd have a hard time NOT throwing the photo album at him and telling him what a pompous ass he is (yes, I was bitter. You would be, too. Bite me). I sit there for a couple minutes and finally decide to make a move. Fuck it. I sat back before and got bupkiss. I won't miss an opportunity twice, dammit! I grab the handkerchiefs instinctively and I tell RiceChex I'll be right back. I head outside where Fish has gone.
He's just finishing up a cigarette when I come out. I joke with him about his goodnight tweet, "This doesn't look like bed to me, Fish!" He laughs and says "Nahh...gotta get my last puff in before I hit the hay." I asked him if he minded that I was out there. He said he didn't...that he was glad. He'd have another smoke since I was out there. (Sweet!)
We spend the next twenty minutes chatting about everything: the guys, the band, his music, the guys' kids, our kids (his youngest is DARLING, btw..he showed me pictures), where we live, the talk of the cruise (at this time, it hadn't been announced, remember?), and a thousand other things that escape me now. I relayed my Jon-heartache and he reassured me and told me not to take it personally. He's just tired and ready to go home. He asked me if we had M&G tomorrow. I told him we did and he said that he'll have his "game face" on tomorrow and be in a better mood. I really did end up feeling better after having talked to Fish. I remembered the handkerchiefs as we were getting ready to go back inside. I asked him if he'd mind giving them to the guys for me and told him they were for Houston since Jon had said he'll be a blubbering mess. He smiled as he read them (Simple white men's hankies that I ironed on the song lyric "We've been together for a long time, Baby...do you have to leave?" on them). He said to hang onto them and give them to them tomorrow at M&G so they'd know who they came from. I told him that I have four more inside for the band and asked him to take these for him and the rest of the guys and I'd just give them the ones I had upstairs. He told me thank you and talked for a couple minutes about how sweet the fans have been to them and how much it means to have our support. I did finally give him a hug goodnight and we went back inside.
RiceChex and I went upstairs shortly thereafter and while I didn't get much sleep (I had to burn pictures onto CD's for the M&G gifts), the sleep I got was magnificent. Damn housekeeping for waking me up at 7am!!
Breathing is Optional, Right? (Part 4)
Wednesday morning came much too early for me (thank you again, Housekeeping) - 7am to be exact. I finished working on the CD's and finally took a break to head to Starbucks. RiceChex was just waking up as I was heading out, so I got her coffee order, too. Silly was happily snuggled in bed & softly snoring, so I didn't bother her.
It was beautiful outside. Bright & sunny, a typical Denver day according to Silly. A few new crazies had planted themselves outside the hotel by this point (the last shift left when Jon went upstairs, I think), but I just ignored them and proceeded to SB, where I ordered two white chocolate mochas (yeah..it's not on the diet, but I was mourning the loss of Fantasy Jon. Cut me some slack.). I meandered back to the hotel, taking my time and enjoying the sunshine. (Have i mentioned how much I LOVE this city, yet? Seriously? I wish my friends and family lived in Colorado, because I'd TOTALLY move there. Year round nice weather? Uhh count me in, thanks!) I get back to the room just as RiceChex is getting out of the shower and Silly's waking up. We decide to make another SB trip. One coffee just is NOT enough when you've 3 hrs of sleep. We wander down there again and this time, I order a tea & get some fruit for breakfast. Jason comes in as we're in line. I smile and ask him if he managed to get any sleep. He says he did and his aviators hide any proof otherwise. We say goodbye and head outside to enjoy the weather.
We don't talk about last night.
It's best that way.
We head back to the hotel and waste some time before checking out and heading back to Silly's to get ready for M&G. Still so much to do! It finally hits us that THIS is it. We've counted down to this day for almost three months and it's finally here. Nerves set in and while Silly tries to help drown my anxieties with killer vodka (Absolute Los Angeles & Cranberry..YUMMO!), there's nothing to calm me down. I barely eat lunch and after we all scramble to get ready on time (yeah..we wasted a shitload of time), we leave the house a little after 3.
We call our Denver Peeps (Mel & the Esses: Melissa, Sara, Shannon & Shauna) to let them know we're on the way. Mel & Sara actually went to HS with Silly. They reconnected because of the guys reunion and we all decided to do our M&G together. Still short a Joe girl and two Danny girls, we hope for the best.
We arrive with plenty of time to spare...even more than we thought, actually, as some numbnuts at ILAA (I Love All Access, the company handling the M&G) sent the wrong time to be there. They actually didn't need us until 4:30, not the 3:45 they put on the damn confirmations. *grumblegrumblemiddlefingerblah* We met up with Mel and the Esses and ran into @honeymolasses & @tdotcaramel again. We chatted with them and a few other girls in line. The beautiful Denver sunshine proved to be hot as hell come late afternoon and we sweated off quite a bit of our makeup and much of our good mood. By the time 5pm rolled around (when we finally got through the line), we were no longer Loving All Access. We checked our cameras, headed inside and got our goodie bags. A bit of a pick-me-up was finding out we had FOURTH row tickets for the show. WOOT!
We picked up drinks (I still couldn't eat. My nerves were SHOT!) and waited for our letter group to be called. We looked all over for the three missing "R" girls in our group to see what we had to work out as far as sharing our boys went, but nobody reared until the last minute. As we'd worked it out, we were good to go on sharing equally. Melissa was a Joe girl, Shauna and I were signed on as Donnie girls. Kimmi & Shannon were Jordan girls and RiceChex & Sara were Jon's. I tell Jon's girls that I only want about 10 seconds with him. A quick hug (okay, so I'm not TOTALLY bitter) and a couple words, then I'll move onto the other guys. They reluctantly agree but warn me they'll be timing me and tapping their feet waiting. I know RiceChex isn't joking. lol
They finally call P, Q and R and we all gather in line. We'd hoped for 1 Joe girl and 2 Danny girls, but the three missing R's threw us for a loop. One was a Joe girl (that works!), one was a Jordan girl (uh oh) and the last was a Jon girl (SHIT...RiceChex does not share well with others). All too quickly, we're putting our purses & bags on the table and rushing past Earl into our M&G.
Breathing is optional, right?
And By God, there WILL be Hugging! (Part 5)
We round the corner and there are the guys.
(God, I'm having a hard time breathing, just remembering it all!!)
As promised, I beeline straight for Jon to get it out of the way. Twenty years in the making and my first words aren't "I love you" or "It's an honor to meet you, finally!"
No.
What comes pouring out of my mouth like word vomit?
SNARK! (Old habits die hard.)
I point to him, chuckling and tell him "You're really good at this avoidance thing!" As he's hugging me, he says "Avoidance? What ah you talkin' about?" (Don't give me a Boston "r," Jonathan. I'm mad at you.) We pull apart and I say "Last night. Hotel Lobby." I don't even stay long enough to hear his answer. (RiceChex later told me that he said something like "I don't remembah" but I sure don't know for sure.)
I move onto Danny, who's standing beside him. I think Danny's used to being the least popular of the group because the hug he gave me was super short and not very cuddly, as if he was releasing me to move onto my favorite NK. I probably confused him when I didn't move on right away but started talking to him, instead. I told him that he'd been a huge inspiration to me. He said "Me? Why's that?" I told him that I'd been doing HIIT every day for the last few weeks because he suggested it. His face lit UP! He took my hands and held them out and gave me the once-over as he asked me how I was doing on it. I told him with a proud smile, "Down 22lbs in about a month!" He said "Damn girl! You're lookin' gooooood!! Nice job, I'm proud of ya! Keep it up!" and he pulled me into a lung-crushing hug and gave me a high-five (His hands? They're huge!). He told me he's gonna start a blog about his HIIT and weight training pretty soon and to watch for it. I told him I'd look forward to it and gave him another hug and a kiss on the cheek. (For those not quick on the draw....Danny just stole me from Donnie.)
Jordan's stepped back to get a drink real quick, so I point to my wrist and say "Time's a tickin'...c'mere, Jordan! I need a hug!" He laughs and gives me a quick hug and before I know it, Donnie's got his arm around me and he's spinning me around for pictures. I remember leaning my head against him for the first picture, then cracking up when he hollered "TAINTS!" before the second one. When they were done, he cupped my face in his hands and kissed my cheek. This is me, completely breathless...I got my Paris Hotel moment!!!! (Ok..maybe I wasn't COMPLETELY stolen away yet).
I asked him real quick if he'd gotten the Team Wahlberg wife beater last night. He said "Uhh...no." I said "Ohh...okay, well, I gave it to Jason in the hotel last night." He said "I'll get it, now!" I grinned and he said "Well, there's Jason..ask him." So I did. Jason said that he'd put it on the bus right after I gave it to him." Donnie said "Yep. I'll get it.
Armando starts pushing us along, but I'm not leaving without a Joe hug....my ONLY goal was to get hugs from ALL five guys (even if I was pissed at one of them). I wait patiently for the few seconds it takes to get my last and final hug from Joe. I kiss his cheek and tell him congratulations on the new baby and then start walking away. I remember the 5 Brothers tshirt and turn around real quick to ask him about it.
"Joe..you got the 5 Brothers tshirt, right?" He responds with a smile "Naw, but I'll get it." And I quickly correct him.."Noooo...the one my friend Michele gave you in Chicago at the book drive." He looks confused for a minute, then quickly smiles "Ohhh..the one with the five of us on it and you all?" pointing to his chest as he describes it." I managed to reply, "Yeah..that one." He says "Yep!! I love it!! Thank you!" He winks and gives me his trademark head twitch.
I.
Am.
Dead.
I couldn't tell you how long we were in our M&G. All I know is that I had exactly the right amount of time to say what I wanted to say, get hugs from all five guys and have one of them tell me he was proud of me (among other things).
So being dead? It's really ok with me at this point.
Thanks for the Heart-On, Jon! (Part 6)
We regroup outside and shriek a little. We relay all of our personal conversations in the M&G to each other and shriek some more. We mosy around for a bit, waiting for ILAA to bring us our cameras back. After a long delay (and at least one panic attack), they finally bring them out and we can go inside the concert.
Our seats? Yeah, they're pretty fantastic.
I'll spare you the song-by-song detail of the show, but the highlights were E-dub singing Step 5, the Celtic Green "Forever" hearts during "I'll Be Loving You Forever," Joe forgetting the words to "Single," Jon giving Danny a "Heart-On," RiceChex's reaction to "Popsicle," Silly's jerky video from Hangin' Tough when the pyro startled her (gigglesnort), and my favorite, Donnie scolding @honeymolasses during Hangin' Tough ("Sharon, put your hands up!"). They guys had a blast and joked around the whole night. It was a FUN show to be at., but like everything fun, it ended way too soon.
My Denver concert pics - save off what you want, just please don't remove the watermark and make sure to give credit where it's due, please?
We made our way to the car and headed home. We changed our clothes, talked about every detail of the day again and again while we uploaded pics & video to our computers and filled our bellies with leftover pot roast from the night before. I think it was somewhere around 4am before we crashed.
The next morning, RiceChex and I got up and around so we could shower, pack and get on the road. We bid bittersweet goodbyes to Silly and headed for Dallas, where we'd meet up with Michele the next morning.
The road trip itself was long and I'm convinced that Texas is *NOT* the largest state in the Union. It's actually Kansas. Holy crikies, have you ever driven through that God-forsaken no-man's-land?! It goes on FOR. EVER! In all seriousness, I think we were in Kansas for nine hours. It was hell. Or so we thought. That's when we got to Oklahoma City and ran into THREE HOURS of a stagnant thunderstorm all the way to Dallas. The constant lightning was giving RiceChex a headache and me? I was just sick of being in the car at that point.
We *finally* rolled into Dallas about 4am. Our hotel was pretty easy to find and was in the heart of downtown. Quaint little place, felt very homey. Bright and colorful and quite the oasis in that crapfest weather we had on the way into town. It didn't take us long to get wound down and asleep.
God Bless Nordstroms (Part 7)
My phone started going off far too early with text alerts - gotta love Twitter. I caught up on the last four hours with one eye open, plotting the death of the sunlight that beams through the gaps in the curtains of our hotel room. I read Tweets from Michele and saw that she wasn't far from arriving. I laid around for the next hour trying to gather the motivation to get up.
Michele got there and we managed to get around so we can hit the mall. RiceChex accidentally left her supercool flip flops at the Brown Palace and since we're not about to drive 15 hours back to get them, we decided to hit the mall instead. And hit it, we did!
Nordstrom's, Carolina Herrera, Tiffany, Anthropologie....we did, however, skip Louis Vuitton, Ed Hardy & Versace. Much to the chagrin of economists, though, we didn't actually buy much. RiceChex replaced her flip-flops at Nordie's, we grabbed some lunch at the food court then we got serious about shopping. RiceChex got a couple pairs of jeans at Anthro and I found a super cute top, but Michele managed to walk away empty-handed, despite having molested "Joe's See-Through Sweater" at the Gap and the Joe brand jeans at Anthro (giggle). We went back to the hotel to shower & get ready for dinner and the concert.
We spiffed ourselves up and made sure we had cameras, signs and tickets before we headed downstairs. After a brief stop at the front desk for directions, we made our way to Porta di Roma, the most AMAZING Italian restaurant. We gorged on huge salads and giant bowls of pasta before rolling ourselves back to the car to head to the arena.
I would like to state that Hell itself cannot POSSIBLY be hotter or more humid than Dallas in July. How we didn't melt between the hotel and the venue is completely beyond me.
We were stuck waiting outside for a bit and it felt strange to actually have to wait in line with everybody else. Up until that point, we'd either gotten to the arenas at 9am and bus-stalked all day or we'd gotten there just in time to go in (either for regular seats or VIP). We played some NK trivia with some girls in line and anxiously waited the 3o minutes it took before we could go in.
Our seats?
Fucking amazing.
The view from my seat. Yes..that's center stage.
I caught up with some girls I know from the .com site and chatted a bit with some of them before the show. Of course there was an extra pulse of excitement in the air as we looked around and noticed all the extra camera equipment for the webcast they were doing for that show to people across the world. We'd already purchased ours to watch later on demand. We were just super pumped for the show.
And of course, they didn't let us down. Full of energy and excitement, they turned on the charm, wit and spunk. This show was *the* best show I'd been to out of all of them. It helped being so close - we were able to interact with them and I spent much of the show catching their glances and grins. Joe, Donnie & Jordan flirted throughout the night and I even got Jon laughing toward the end of the show. I can only hope I get that experience again because it was amazing.
Pics from the Dallas Concert
(As always, please don't remove watermark and give credit where it's due. Thank you!)
When the show was over, we raced to the car so we could get to GhostBar for the After-Party. Of course, because Murphy couldn't be left out, his law dictated our delay when there was an accident on the freeway. It took us twice as long to get to the bar than it should have. The bonus: this did offer us the ability to change our clothes, put on makeup and fix our hair...in the car, of course. (All those years in band & cheerleading sure paid off for in-vehicle-wardrobe-changes!) Even with the delay, we still managed to beat the guys to the club. WOOT!
THIS is what all the fuss is about? Seriously?(Part 8)
GhostBar had a line outside, which we were anticipating, but we let Michele out while we went to get valet. RiceChex & I went inside real quick at the W to change, then we joined Michele. It wasn't long before we were on our way inside. We had to wait a little bit for the elevator. It seemed weird to have to ride an elevator to a club. You can tell we're from PoDunk, USA.
Pics from the GhostBar afterparty
The club was pretty busy already, but when the Donnie, Joe & Danny got there moments later, it absolutely EXPLODED with people. It was like everybody followed the guys from the show or something. We lost Michele for a little while, who'd made her way toward the VIP ropes. We caught up a little while later and stood a few people behind her, snapping pictures into the Fishbowl that was VIP. I couldn't get many decent ones, but it was nice being that close to them. We hoped for the best, but knew we'd probably never see the other side of those ropes.
Donnie & Joe made their way to the DJ booth and even sang a couple of songs, which was cool. I shot a few pics and revived RiceChex after she saw Joe in the aviator shades he's taken such a liking to. It was pure craziness in that club.
After having had a drink spilled into my purse, RiceChex and I made our way to the back bar to rehydrate. It was pure insanity. I sucked back about six waters before I was finally not stabby anymore. About that time, Ethan (their bass player) came by and talked to me for a couple brief moments.
After that point, we went out on the balcony because we wanted to see these glass floors Jon had tweeted about the night before, but sadly, the floor on the public balcony wasn't glass. It was concrete. The balcony itself was all glass..and that part was pretty awesome. I took a few pictures, then we went back inside. We texted Michele that we had retreated to the back of the bar to wait for her. A few moments later, the bouncers announced the bar was closing and that was it.
I did try to get closer to Donnie as he passed by, but to no avail.
Michele, RiceChex & I waited for the elevator (have you ever seen 300 people try to file out of a club at the same time?!) and eventually made our way outside. A fun little bonus was seeing see Jesse Metcalf (Desperate Housewives) and his date entering the Ghost Bar as we were waiting for valet.
We went back to the hotel, changed into PJ's and decided to upload & go through pictures, then watched the webcast of the Dallas show. I'd bought it earlier in the week because I wanted to see it when we got "home." RiceChex lasted about 20 mins before she turned in. Michele and I both ended up falling asleep watching it, turning in at somewhere close to 5am.
The after-party was an experience I'll never forget, but one I'm not keen on repeating anytime soon.
The Conclusion of the Tits & Wits Tour (Part 9)
We reluctantly dragged out of bed late morning and pulled our stuff together. RiceChex and I had a three hour drive ahead of us to get to Houston and Michele had to catch a flight home. We said our goodbyes & hit the road around noon.
Rice Chex and I grabbed lunch at Whattaburger and then stopped later at Starbucks (hey..it *had* to be done). The trip didn't take long and we were in Houston before we knew it. We tracked down the arena and double-checked with the box office to see if there were any seats that were closer, but there weren't. This show was gonna be huge.
We decided to go do some shopping and maybe grab some supper before the show. There was a little shopping center close to the arena called "The Woodlands" so we went there, perused Borders (or was it Barnes & Noble? I can't remember now.) for a bit. From there, we headed to some other super-cute shops and prayed the rain clouds on the western horizon would blow past us.
They didn't.
Fortunately, we'd already disappeared inside Jasper's for supper when the brunt of the storm hit. Ahh, Jasper's. What a WONDERFULLY splendid place to eat! I got the ribs (award-winning, I might add), RiceChex got the salmon. We also got calimari for our appetizer and creme brulee for dessert. It was quite possibly the most magnificent meal I've EVER had. HIGHLY recommend it to anyone going to Texas (they've got other locations).
The rain finally died off about the time we finished our meal, so we headed to the car to drop off packages and then head to the arena. Fortunately, the wicked bad storms killed the humidity that had left us both frizzy and sweaty and it was borderline chilly! Texas? July? And we're cold?? And I thought the weather in Iowa was weird.
Anyway....we make our way to our seats.
Clear. The hell over to the right and NOWHERE near the front of the arena, where we've been the last several shows. I'm *NOT* ok with these seats. Neither of us are. But what can ya do. There wasn't anything closer. At least we were there.
When Jabbas came on, I spied the back-up dancers hanging out on the side of the arena watching them. I jumped on the opportunity and asked them if they'd pose for a picture with me. They were all very willing (and I'll tell you now, I wanted to stuff them all in my pocket and take them home to fatten them up - they're SO damn skinny!!) and I got a great picture with them.
I also managed to pin Chris (their drummer) down in the concession area and got a self portrait with him. He's such a sweetie. Love that boy! :)
The concert.....ahh, the concert.
I started crying the minute "Close to You" started in. I promptly lost my contact as a result. So, I watched the entire concert with my right eye (Yeah, the headache was unavoidable.) but it's all good. Almost every song brought tears to my eyes...not knowing when we'd do this again was weighing heavily on our minds, to say the least. It was nice to sit back and just enjoy the show, though. I took fewer pictures than I'd taken at the other shows, so I was able to just take it all in more.
There were some great moments - Cover Girl when Kentucky, Crunchy Kevin & other stage hands sexually assaulted Donnie....Seven Naked Ninjas during Donnie's monologue...Joe coming out in a cape during Tonight, then ripping his shirt open at the end of the song. Crazy stuff, I tell ya!
Lil tip, Princess...I mean seriously? If you're going to go through the work of making a sign, sneaking it into the arena and blocking my view the ENTIRE show, the least you could've done was check your spelling. Jus' sayin.
Uneducated BlockHead aside, the show was pretty fantastic. It was heart-wrenching, though, to see our boys start crying on stage. Joe teared up during "Please, don't go girl" and I thought I was gonna die. But "I'll Be Loving You" was torture. Battery-operated tea-lights lit the arena and every single man on that stage was brought to tears. Jon even had to run off stage to collect himself. The standing ovation was incredible. (Not my video)
RiceChex and I pretty much stayed in tears throughout the rest of the show. We laughed, too, but mostly, we cried. I wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere else that night, though. We also made the decision for any and all future tours, regardless of where the show is, we will be there.
Pictures from Houston (Reminder, please feel free to save off what you want, just give credit where it's due and don't remove my watermark. Thanks!)
When the show ended, RiceChex and I started the long trek home. We made pit stops at several points along the way, our favorite being Buc-ee's - this MASSIVE redneck mecca where their selling points were "The Cleanest Bathrooms in Texas" (they really were!) and something about being the Beaver Nugget Capital of Texas, which is ironic because until I went to Texas, I didn't even realize what a beaver nugget was, much less that IOWA might have one of these capitals. Hmm.
Armed with a bag of beaver nuggets, fresh sodas & some other snacks, we made our way home, pulling in around 6pm on Sunday. Our trip had come to an end.
Now, two months later, we're finally in an emotional spot to be able to watch the videos from the Houston show and not burst into tears (okay, well, we're not sobbing loud enough to attract our neighbors' attention anymore, at least). We've got amazing memories and thousands of pictures and videos (which reminds me...RiceChex, we need to get our videos from whatshername!) to commemorate this trip, which we affectionately nicknamed the "Tits & Wits Tour."
Top 10 Lessons Learned on the Tits & Wits Tour
1. Always double-check your hotel room for belongings (such as killer leather flip-flops) you might have left behind.
2. The license plate game goes on long after the trip has ended.
3. Take time to stop at quirky convenience stores, especially if they claim to have the cleanest bathrooms in the state.
4. Don't drink three giant glasses of tea before you leave on a 12 hr road trip.
5. Make sure to charge your phone battery, have a car charger AND invest in a back-up battery so you don't Tweet yourself into a dead zone too early in the trip.
6. Ogallala, Nebraska is, by far, the hickest town in the nation. I felt smarter upon leaving the city limits.
7. Always find out *exactly* where the group is staying so you don't end up with hotel reservations at more than one hotel per night.
8. By "Jon's Law" you can technically say you slept with a New Kid if you stay at the same hotel.
9. Screaming "SIT DOWN!" at the nutcase in front of you when she's standing on her chair during Jordan's solo, does NOT a clean video make.
10. Spending time with your best friends really IS what the trip is all about - don't squander a moment worrying about all this other shit. You can never get those moments back. Cherish them.
There's so much I want to say about my trip to Denver, Dallas & Houston I can't even think of where to begin.
I'm overwhelmed with great memories, hilarious stories, personal realizations and emotional moments. Everything just runs altogether and I can't seem to split it out into plausible thought.
I guess I'll start with THANK YOU...to RiceChex, criSILLYus, Michele and all the rest of my Blockhead sisters who made this week such a remarkable trip. You all made this trip possible in SO many ways. I will be grateful forever for the part you've played in my life.
RiceChex and I started out our trip bright and early Monday morning, July 13th. We left my house about 5:30ish and after a stop at Stahbucks, we were on our way!
We played the license plate game the entire trip and really, it went by quickly. We searched for tumbleweed, but much to our disappointment, it was all still in the field. We made record time, though and surprised criSILLYus by rolling into town about two hours earlier than we thought we would. We did some catching up, filling Silly in on the craziness that has become our lives (for which she was QUICKLY on board!). She made us some quick dinner (Yummy pot roast & mashed potatoes!) and we decided to head toward downtown Denver for some tour bus recon.It actually didn't take us long. Ole EagleEyes in the backseat (RiceChex) found them within about two blocks. I could go into long, lengthy details here, but suffice it to say, we found their hotel within about 30 mins of intel & recon work. Or so we thought.
We'd already made the decision to stay at the Hotel Monaco, where we saw the crew entering & leaving. Then Jon twitpic'd a photo of some chocolates the hotel had sent to his room. Silly, having the memory of an elephant (only person I know with a better memory than me), recognized the background of the room and with closer looking at the emblem on the placard on Jon's chocolate tray, we diagnosed that it wasn't the Hotel Monaco they were staying at, but the Brown Palace Hotel (one of the most historic hotels in the nation, btw). Well this certainly put a crimp in things! Two hotels. One reservation at the wrong hotel! What to do?!?
Book a room at the Brown Palace, of course. Hey..I just threw the idea out there, RiceChex was the one who ran with it!! Ok..so this MIGHT be proof of our insanity (I know, big word I don't understand)
So we laze around a bit Tuesday morning and Silly, being the perfect hostess, makes us breakfast while we get our stuff together. After a stop for a mani/pedi, some last minute shopping at Target and some lunch at Corner Bakery on the Mall downtown, we head to the Brown Palace to get checked in. We get the LAST available room (we rock...and we manage to resist making fun of the poor saps outside who didn't get rooms) and haul our stuff up to the 7th floor, all the while, anxious and jumpy that at any moment a stray New Kid may pop out of nowhere. We settle in and then have to leave again because my hair appointment is at 4. So, armed with just our purses, we head back downstairs. Rounding the corner toward the parking lot where we've left Silly's car, I stop mid-stride and smother a gasp.
Who's sitting there with his back to us while he texts on his BB and puffs on a ciggie?
Jonathan.
Fucking.
Knight.
(insert internal fan girl squeals here...my composure was actually completely maintained in person.)
Talk about popping up out of NOWHERE! ACK! I spin around and look at RiceChex...all I have to say is "Umm...hon??" and she's ready to fly back inside. I honestly can't confirm that she breathed at all during the following exchange. Nonchalantly, I call his name...
"Jonathan?"
He turns around all squinty eyed..."Heyyy"
"Can we bug you for a couple minutes?" I ask tenatively, but again...quite composed. You'd have been SO impressed!
He rubs his face and says "Awww, man, I just got up a couple minutes ago, can you give me a few?"
(Oh sweet Jesus, the man just rolled out of bed....PG thoughts. PG thoughts. PG thoughts!!!!)
"Sure..not a problem..thank you anyway!!" I manage to mutter before we casually stroll down the sidewalk and around the corner.
This is where the tears and the excitement set in. WE. JUST. TALKED. to JONATHAN EFFING KNIGHT! Mr. Elusive!! Mr. Can't Be Bothered! Mr. I'll Never Come Off This Damn Bus! from the fall and spring tours. OH. MY. GOD!
Breathe.
Breathing is good, here.
So, while we make a couple quick texts to friends, we try to regain the composure we just blew all to hell around the corner. A few minutes later, we come back around the corner, but he's gone.
Damn, he's good.
On a mission, we skip off to the car and head to my hair appointment, where we relay our story to at least two other people, who either A) are as excited as we are or B) fake it really well.
They Turned the Gay Light on for Us! (Part 2)
So, Todd, who I might add is a fucking genius, whips my hair into shape.
Before:
After:
Honestly, I didn't know what to expect when I went in, but WOW..I was *SO* pleased with the results!!! (btw..for those of you in the Denver area: www.hairbytodd.com CALL the boy and make your appointment. You won't be disappointed!! For those of you NOT in the Denver area...take a vacation - he's SO worth it!)
So anyway....we make plans with Todd for him to join us later for dinner & karaoke and we part ways. Back to the hotel we go. The Brown Palace, that is. We still haven't checked into the Moraco. We are fortunate enough to find a meter outside the front door and we plug some change into it before heading across the street.
Walking up, I recognize Jason outside having a smoke. For those who don't know, Jason is Donnie's manager/assistant. I met him in Chicago in June and he was there for my Team Wahlberg girls in Holmdel earlier in the month. He's the sweetest guy and someone I am in serious crush with. Lovelovelove Jason. So I stop by and say hi...we chat for a couple minutes about some of the other peeps he's managing and we head inside to get ready for dinner. A quick sweep of the lobby while we wait for the elevators determines that our boys are still MIA.
We head upstairs, change clothes, fix hair & makeup and we're off again!
Hamburger Mary's for dinner. FABULOUS place...they even turned the Gay Light on for us: (Hey..I'm not being discriminatory...the waiter said it first!)
RiceChex & Me in front of Marilyn on the patio at HM's:
RiceChex having sucked back a cocktail or two (Silly's mom is in the background):
We dodge random rain showers and finally retreat under a giant umbrella right before our meal comes. We manage to eat at least some of our enormous sandwiches (seriously...they're taller than our glasses!). Bloated and belchy, we head across the street to JR's, a karaoke bar.
Silly's friend Adam is spinning tunes, so we pick a table close to the booth and saddle up with some cocktails. My friends @honeymolasses & @tdotcaramel join us (they just flew in from Toronto that night for the concert). We chat a bit about our boys & tomorrow's show. It was cool to finally have met them after having talked on Twitter so long.
I finally get around to picking karaoke music...I choose a couple of songs from the book - a Wynonna tune that's good for a warm-up and my favorite Cher song ever, the Shoop Shoop song. Of course, it doesn't dawn on me until my name is called for the second song that me singing Cher in a gay bar is like getting up at the Apollo. I asked Silly about it. She said "You'll be fine...they won't boo you. Just don't fuck it up." Gee? Ya think?!! No pressure. I do manage not only to NOT get booed off the stage, I got applause after the song AND even a few whoops & hollers DURING the song. Guess I don't suck as bad as I thought! LOL
Bitter, bitter, bitter, bitter, BITTER! (Part 3)
The night progresses and we decide we've had enough fun for one night. Besides...there's stalking to do!!! We say our goodbyes and we head back to the hotel (again..the Brown Palace..not the Moraco...we never did check in. Let's be honest. Who's had time?!). We change from our super-cute dresses into more casual wear and head to the hotel lobby, which surprisingly, for housing an entire boy band, their families, the band and dancers, is entirely EMPTY. (There are a couple handfuls of groupies outside, but the lobby itself is bare.) I've got my laptop, RiceChex has her iTouch and Silly's armed with her phone. I have Jon's scrapbook that I worked on all weekend, Donnie's "Team Wahlberg" wifebeater and handkerchiefs that I've crafted up for the guys and the band for Houston (the final show of the tour on Saturday).
Shortly after getting downstairs, I see Jason come in and I decide he's probably the best bet for getting Donnie's gift to him, so I head over to say hi. I joke that he's following me and it's starting to creep me out. He just chuckles. I ask him if he can do me a favor and give Donnie my gift. He says he will...he takes the bag and he heads outside. Whew...one gift down!
We sit there forever...I'm tapping along happily on my laptop, RiceChex's tuned out with her ear buds in and Silly's playing on her phone. Every door that opens, every elevator ding, every movement that seems remotely out of place has my attention. Even Silly is laughing at my ability to continue typing on the laptop but glance at whatever happens around me without skipping a beat. (hey..we told her we have this stalking shit down to an art. She doesn't believe us.) I see Jason a couple more times coming and going. During one of his trips, I craftily run over to see what floor he gets off on. (Told you I'm good.) By now, it's after 2:30 and my enthusiasm is waning. Jordan's tweeted a dozen times about trying to work the AC in his room. Donnie's given his Yoda-like wisdom for the day and I'm just about over this whole thing.
Finally, the elevator dings and we hit paydirt.
The doors open and Jon steps out (wearing the same blue shirt & jeans he had on earlier in the day). I snap my fingers at RiceChex(who's snuggled down in the chair and doesn't catch the new development...slacker!) and I stand up, calling out his name as I grab his album and make my way toward the door. By the time I get around the glass partition, he's in the revolving door giving me a "WTF" look. I motion for him to come here and he smiles (gah!) and holds up his finger as if to say "gimme a minute." I nod and smile back.
I'm. A. Mess.
My feet are bouncing, I'm tapping my fingernails on the table, my stomach is in knots and I can't seem to calm down.
Five minutes go by.
Ten.
Fifteen.
Seriously?? Did the bastard find a back entrance or did the crazies outside kidnap him?!
Twenty.
You've GOT to be kidding me...
FINALLY...25 minutes later, I see the revolving doors kick on and he comes spinning in, focused on his phone. I call out his name again as I fly out of my chair and head toward the elevator, where he's headed with his album in my hands. He hops on the first empty elevator (both are sitting wide open waiting for passengers). The doors are closing as I reach them and I call out "Jon!! I have a gift for you!!" Of course, in my head, I picture his hand coming out to stop the elevator doors from closing, his magical smile appearing and him saying "Oh yeah? Well c'meah...whatcha got?" There's hugging...conversations about the pictures in the book and we spend a good twenty minutes discussing his frustrations about tour, how glad he is to be almost done with it. There, of course, are more hugs and pictures and our night ends on an amazing note.
To say that's NOT how it happened is an understatement.
No hand appears. There's no funny anecdotes being shared, no hugs, no pictures and certainly no amazing notes.
Just a sour one.
As the door closes, three thoughts instantly come to my mind:
1) Flinging the picture album in the elevator and hearing an "Oww!!" as the elevator dings closed.
2) Jumping on the other elevator and following Mr. Knight up to his floor and hopefully at least being able to give him the book without him calling Armando or Earl to throw me over the balcony first.
3) Standing there paralyzed, broken-hearted and seriously disgusted by my second blow-off from Jon Knight in less than 12 hours (and the sixth in less than a year).
You can guess which one I chose.
Dejected, I stand there, watching the arrow point to each floor as he ascends and heads off to his safe little world upstairs.
I won't cry.
I won't cry.
I won't cry.
*sniffle*
I turned around and walked slowly back to the table. Honestly, I don't remember what was said amongst the three of us at this point. I just know we were all feeling seriously dejected. Silly retired to bed a few minutes later and I finished up a conversation on Yahoo, relaying what just happened to @twistedmacsista, who'd been on pins & needles waiting for the conclusion to our great hotel escapades.
I check Twitter a few times to see if I missed anything. A goodnight from Jason, Jordan & Fish. Hmm...guess everybody's going to bed. We might as well...
*ding*
My head jerks up...
Fish!
Okay..so it's not Jon, but at this point, I think I'd have a hard time NOT throwing the photo album at him and telling him what a pompous ass he is (yes, I was bitter. You would be, too. Bite me). I sit there for a couple minutes and finally decide to make a move. Fuck it. I sat back before and got bupkiss. I won't miss an opportunity twice, dammit! I grab the handkerchiefs instinctively and I tell RiceChex I'll be right back. I head outside where Fish has gone.
He's just finishing up a cigarette when I come out. I joke with him about his goodnight tweet, "This doesn't look like bed to me, Fish!" He laughs and says "Nahh...gotta get my last puff in before I hit the hay." I asked him if he minded that I was out there. He said he didn't...that he was glad. He'd have another smoke since I was out there. (Sweet!)
We spend the next twenty minutes chatting about everything: the guys, the band, his music, the guys' kids, our kids (his youngest is DARLING, btw..he showed me pictures), where we live, the talk of the cruise (at this time, it hadn't been announced, remember?), and a thousand other things that escape me now. I relayed my Jon-heartache and he reassured me and told me not to take it personally. He's just tired and ready to go home. He asked me if we had M&G tomorrow. I told him we did and he said that he'll have his "game face" on tomorrow and be in a better mood. I really did end up feeling better after having talked to Fish. I remembered the handkerchiefs as we were getting ready to go back inside. I asked him if he'd mind giving them to the guys for me and told him they were for Houston since Jon had said he'll be a blubbering mess. He smiled as he read them (Simple white men's hankies that I ironed on the song lyric "We've been together for a long time, Baby...do you have to leave?" on them). He said to hang onto them and give them to them tomorrow at M&G so they'd know who they came from. I told him that I have four more inside for the band and asked him to take these for him and the rest of the guys and I'd just give them the ones I had upstairs. He told me thank you and talked for a couple minutes about how sweet the fans have been to them and how much it means to have our support. I did finally give him a hug goodnight and we went back inside.
RiceChex and I went upstairs shortly thereafter and while I didn't get much sleep (I had to burn pictures onto CD's for the M&G gifts), the sleep I got was magnificent. Damn housekeeping for waking me up at 7am!!
Breathing is Optional, Right? (Part 4)
Wednesday morning came much too early for me (thank you again, Housekeeping) - 7am to be exact. I finished working on the CD's and finally took a break to head to Starbucks. RiceChex was just waking up as I was heading out, so I got her coffee order, too. Silly was happily snuggled in bed & softly snoring, so I didn't bother her.
It was beautiful outside. Bright & sunny, a typical Denver day according to Silly. A few new crazies had planted themselves outside the hotel by this point (the last shift left when Jon went upstairs, I think), but I just ignored them and proceeded to SB, where I ordered two white chocolate mochas (yeah..it's not on the diet, but I was mourning the loss of Fantasy Jon. Cut me some slack.). I meandered back to the hotel, taking my time and enjoying the sunshine. (Have i mentioned how much I LOVE this city, yet? Seriously? I wish my friends and family lived in Colorado, because I'd TOTALLY move there. Year round nice weather? Uhh count me in, thanks!) I get back to the room just as RiceChex is getting out of the shower and Silly's waking up. We decide to make another SB trip. One coffee just is NOT enough when you've 3 hrs of sleep. We wander down there again and this time, I order a tea & get some fruit for breakfast. Jason comes in as we're in line. I smile and ask him if he managed to get any sleep. He says he did and his aviators hide any proof otherwise. We say goodbye and head outside to enjoy the weather.
We don't talk about last night.
It's best that way.
We head back to the hotel and waste some time before checking out and heading back to Silly's to get ready for M&G. Still so much to do! It finally hits us that THIS is it. We've counted down to this day for almost three months and it's finally here. Nerves set in and while Silly tries to help drown my anxieties with killer vodka (Absolute Los Angeles & Cranberry..YUMMO!), there's nothing to calm me down. I barely eat lunch and after we all scramble to get ready on time (yeah..we wasted a shitload of time), we leave the house a little after 3.
We call our Denver Peeps (Mel & the Esses: Melissa, Sara, Shannon & Shauna) to let them know we're on the way. Mel & Sara actually went to HS with Silly. They reconnected because of the guys reunion and we all decided to do our M&G together. Still short a Joe girl and two Danny girls, we hope for the best.
We arrive with plenty of time to spare...even more than we thought, actually, as some numbnuts at ILAA (I Love All Access, the company handling the M&G) sent the wrong time to be there. They actually didn't need us until 4:30, not the 3:45 they put on the damn confirmations. *grumblegrumblemiddlefingerblah* We met up with Mel and the Esses and ran into @honeymolasses & @tdotcaramel again. We chatted with them and a few other girls in line. The beautiful Denver sunshine proved to be hot as hell come late afternoon and we sweated off quite a bit of our makeup and much of our good mood. By the time 5pm rolled around (when we finally got through the line), we were no longer Loving All Access. We checked our cameras, headed inside and got our goodie bags. A bit of a pick-me-up was finding out we had FOURTH row tickets for the show. WOOT!
We picked up drinks (I still couldn't eat. My nerves were SHOT!) and waited for our letter group to be called. We looked all over for the three missing "R" girls in our group to see what we had to work out as far as sharing our boys went, but nobody reared until the last minute. As we'd worked it out, we were good to go on sharing equally. Melissa was a Joe girl, Shauna and I were signed on as Donnie girls. Kimmi & Shannon were Jordan girls and RiceChex & Sara were Jon's. I tell Jon's girls that I only want about 10 seconds with him. A quick hug (okay, so I'm not TOTALLY bitter) and a couple words, then I'll move onto the other guys. They reluctantly agree but warn me they'll be timing me and tapping their feet waiting. I know RiceChex isn't joking. lol
They finally call P, Q and R and we all gather in line. We'd hoped for 1 Joe girl and 2 Danny girls, but the three missing R's threw us for a loop. One was a Joe girl (that works!), one was a Jordan girl (uh oh) and the last was a Jon girl (SHIT...RiceChex does not share well with others). All too quickly, we're putting our purses & bags on the table and rushing past Earl into our M&G.
Breathing is optional, right?
And By God, there WILL be Hugging! (Part 5)
We round the corner and there are the guys.
(God, I'm having a hard time breathing, just remembering it all!!)
As promised, I beeline straight for Jon to get it out of the way. Twenty years in the making and my first words aren't "I love you" or "It's an honor to meet you, finally!"
No.
What comes pouring out of my mouth like word vomit?
SNARK! (Old habits die hard.)
I point to him, chuckling and tell him "You're really good at this avoidance thing!" As he's hugging me, he says "Avoidance? What ah you talkin' about?" (Don't give me a Boston "r," Jonathan. I'm mad at you.) We pull apart and I say "Last night. Hotel Lobby." I don't even stay long enough to hear his answer. (RiceChex later told me that he said something like "I don't remembah" but I sure don't know for sure.)
I move onto Danny, who's standing beside him. I think Danny's used to being the least popular of the group because the hug he gave me was super short and not very cuddly, as if he was releasing me to move onto my favorite NK. I probably confused him when I didn't move on right away but started talking to him, instead. I told him that he'd been a huge inspiration to me. He said "Me? Why's that?" I told him that I'd been doing HIIT every day for the last few weeks because he suggested it. His face lit UP! He took my hands and held them out and gave me the once-over as he asked me how I was doing on it. I told him with a proud smile, "Down 22lbs in about a month!" He said "Damn girl! You're lookin' gooooood!! Nice job, I'm proud of ya! Keep it up!" and he pulled me into a lung-crushing hug and gave me a high-five (His hands? They're huge!). He told me he's gonna start a blog about his HIIT and weight training pretty soon and to watch for it. I told him I'd look forward to it and gave him another hug and a kiss on the cheek. (For those not quick on the draw....Danny just stole me from Donnie.)
Jordan's stepped back to get a drink real quick, so I point to my wrist and say "Time's a tickin'...c'mere, Jordan! I need a hug!" He laughs and gives me a quick hug and before I know it, Donnie's got his arm around me and he's spinning me around for pictures. I remember leaning my head against him for the first picture, then cracking up when he hollered "TAINTS!" before the second one. When they were done, he cupped my face in his hands and kissed my cheek. This is me, completely breathless...I got my Paris Hotel moment!!!! (Ok..maybe I wasn't COMPLETELY stolen away yet).
I asked him real quick if he'd gotten the Team Wahlberg wife beater last night. He said "Uhh...no." I said "Ohh...okay, well, I gave it to Jason in the hotel last night." He said "I'll get it, now!" I grinned and he said "Well, there's Jason..ask him." So I did. Jason said that he'd put it on the bus right after I gave it to him." Donnie said "Yep. I'll get it.
Armando starts pushing us along, but I'm not leaving without a Joe hug....my ONLY goal was to get hugs from ALL five guys (even if I was pissed at one of them). I wait patiently for the few seconds it takes to get my last and final hug from Joe. I kiss his cheek and tell him congratulations on the new baby and then start walking away. I remember the 5 Brothers tshirt and turn around real quick to ask him about it.
"Joe..you got the 5 Brothers tshirt, right?" He responds with a smile "Naw, but I'll get it." And I quickly correct him.."Noooo...the one my friend Michele gave you in Chicago at the book drive." He looks confused for a minute, then quickly smiles "Ohhh..the one with the five of us on it and you all?" pointing to his chest as he describes it." I managed to reply, "Yeah..that one." He says "Yep!! I love it!! Thank you!" He winks and gives me his trademark head twitch.
I.
Am.
Dead.
I couldn't tell you how long we were in our M&G. All I know is that I had exactly the right amount of time to say what I wanted to say, get hugs from all five guys and have one of them tell me he was proud of me (among other things).
So being dead? It's really ok with me at this point.
Thanks for the Heart-On, Jon! (Part 6)
We regroup outside and shriek a little. We relay all of our personal conversations in the M&G to each other and shriek some more. We mosy around for a bit, waiting for ILAA to bring us our cameras back. After a long delay (and at least one panic attack), they finally bring them out and we can go inside the concert.
Our seats? Yeah, they're pretty fantastic.
I'll spare you the song-by-song detail of the show, but the highlights were E-dub singing Step 5, the Celtic Green "Forever" hearts during "I'll Be Loving You Forever," Joe forgetting the words to "Single," Jon giving Danny a "Heart-On," RiceChex's reaction to "Popsicle," Silly's jerky video from Hangin' Tough when the pyro startled her (gigglesnort), and my favorite, Donnie scolding @honeymolasses during Hangin' Tough ("Sharon, put your hands up!"). They guys had a blast and joked around the whole night. It was a FUN show to be at., but like everything fun, it ended way too soon.
My Denver concert pics - save off what you want, just please don't remove the watermark and make sure to give credit where it's due, please?
We made our way to the car and headed home. We changed our clothes, talked about every detail of the day again and again while we uploaded pics & video to our computers and filled our bellies with leftover pot roast from the night before. I think it was somewhere around 4am before we crashed.
The next morning, RiceChex and I got up and around so we could shower, pack and get on the road. We bid bittersweet goodbyes to Silly and headed for Dallas, where we'd meet up with Michele the next morning.
The road trip itself was long and I'm convinced that Texas is *NOT* the largest state in the Union. It's actually Kansas. Holy crikies, have you ever driven through that God-forsaken no-man's-land?! It goes on FOR. EVER! In all seriousness, I think we were in Kansas for nine hours. It was hell. Or so we thought. That's when we got to Oklahoma City and ran into THREE HOURS of a stagnant thunderstorm all the way to Dallas. The constant lightning was giving RiceChex a headache and me? I was just sick of being in the car at that point.
We *finally* rolled into Dallas about 4am. Our hotel was pretty easy to find and was in the heart of downtown. Quaint little place, felt very homey. Bright and colorful and quite the oasis in that crapfest weather we had on the way into town. It didn't take us long to get wound down and asleep.
God Bless Nordstroms (Part 7)
My phone started going off far too early with text alerts - gotta love Twitter. I caught up on the last four hours with one eye open, plotting the death of the sunlight that beams through the gaps in the curtains of our hotel room. I read Tweets from Michele and saw that she wasn't far from arriving. I laid around for the next hour trying to gather the motivation to get up.
Michele got there and we managed to get around so we can hit the mall. RiceChex accidentally left her supercool flip flops at the Brown Palace and since we're not about to drive 15 hours back to get them, we decided to hit the mall instead. And hit it, we did!
Nordstrom's, Carolina Herrera, Tiffany, Anthropologie....we did, however, skip Louis Vuitton, Ed Hardy & Versace. Much to the chagrin of economists, though, we didn't actually buy much. RiceChex replaced her flip-flops at Nordie's, we grabbed some lunch at the food court then we got serious about shopping. RiceChex got a couple pairs of jeans at Anthro and I found a super cute top, but Michele managed to walk away empty-handed, despite having molested "Joe's See-Through Sweater" at the Gap and the Joe brand jeans at Anthro (giggle). We went back to the hotel to shower & get ready for dinner and the concert.
We spiffed ourselves up and made sure we had cameras, signs and tickets before we headed downstairs. After a brief stop at the front desk for directions, we made our way to Porta di Roma, the most AMAZING Italian restaurant. We gorged on huge salads and giant bowls of pasta before rolling ourselves back to the car to head to the arena.
I would like to state that Hell itself cannot POSSIBLY be hotter or more humid than Dallas in July. How we didn't melt between the hotel and the venue is completely beyond me.
RiceChex, me & Michele
We were stuck waiting outside for a bit and it felt strange to actually have to wait in line with everybody else. Up until that point, we'd either gotten to the arenas at 9am and bus-stalked all day or we'd gotten there just in time to go in (either for regular seats or VIP). We played some NK trivia with some girls in line and anxiously waited the 3o minutes it took before we could go in.
Our seats?
Fucking amazing.
The view from my seat. Yes..that's center stage.
The view of everybody else behind us.
And of course, they didn't let us down. Full of energy and excitement, they turned on the charm, wit and spunk. This show was *the* best show I'd been to out of all of them. It helped being so close - we were able to interact with them and I spent much of the show catching their glances and grins. Joe, Donnie & Jordan flirted throughout the night and I even got Jon laughing toward the end of the show. I can only hope I get that experience again because it was amazing.
Pics from the Dallas Concert
(As always, please don't remove watermark and give credit where it's due. Thank you!)
When the show was over, we raced to the car so we could get to GhostBar for the After-Party. Of course, because Murphy couldn't be left out, his law dictated our delay when there was an accident on the freeway. It took us twice as long to get to the bar than it should have. The bonus: this did offer us the ability to change our clothes, put on makeup and fix our hair...in the car, of course. (All those years in band & cheerleading sure paid off for in-vehicle-wardrobe-changes!) Even with the delay, we still managed to beat the guys to the club. WOOT!
THIS is what all the fuss is about? Seriously?(Part 8)
GhostBar had a line outside, which we were anticipating, but we let Michele out while we went to get valet. RiceChex & I went inside real quick at the W to change, then we joined Michele. It wasn't long before we were on our way inside. We had to wait a little bit for the elevator. It seemed weird to have to ride an elevator to a club. You can tell we're from PoDunk, USA.
Pics from the GhostBar afterparty
The club was pretty busy already, but when the Donnie, Joe & Danny got there moments later, it absolutely EXPLODED with people. It was like everybody followed the guys from the show or something. We lost Michele for a little while, who'd made her way toward the VIP ropes. We caught up a little while later and stood a few people behind her, snapping pictures into the Fishbowl that was VIP. I couldn't get many decent ones, but it was nice being that close to them. We hoped for the best, but knew we'd probably never see the other side of those ropes.
Donnie & Joe made their way to the DJ booth and even sang a couple of songs, which was cool. I shot a few pics and revived RiceChex after she saw Joe in the aviator shades he's taken such a liking to. It was pure craziness in that club.
After having had a drink spilled into my purse, RiceChex and I made our way to the back bar to rehydrate. It was pure insanity. I sucked back about six waters before I was finally not stabby anymore. About that time, Ethan (their bass player) came by and talked to me for a couple brief moments.
After that point, we went out on the balcony because we wanted to see these glass floors Jon had tweeted about the night before, but sadly, the floor on the public balcony wasn't glass. It was concrete. The balcony itself was all glass..and that part was pretty awesome. I took a few pictures, then we went back inside. We texted Michele that we had retreated to the back of the bar to wait for her. A few moments later, the bouncers announced the bar was closing and that was it.I did try to get closer to Donnie as he passed by, but to no avail.
Michele, RiceChex & I waited for the elevator (have you ever seen 300 people try to file out of a club at the same time?!) and eventually made our way outside. A fun little bonus was seeing see Jesse Metcalf (Desperate Housewives) and his date entering the Ghost Bar as we were waiting for valet.
We went back to the hotel, changed into PJ's and decided to upload & go through pictures, then watched the webcast of the Dallas show. I'd bought it earlier in the week because I wanted to see it when we got "home." RiceChex lasted about 20 mins before she turned in. Michele and I both ended up falling asleep watching it, turning in at somewhere close to 5am.
The after-party was an experience I'll never forget, but one I'm not keen on repeating anytime soon.
The Conclusion of the Tits & Wits Tour (Part 9)
We reluctantly dragged out of bed late morning and pulled our stuff together. RiceChex and I had a three hour drive ahead of us to get to Houston and Michele had to catch a flight home. We said our goodbyes & hit the road around noon.
Rice Chex and I grabbed lunch at Whattaburger and then stopped later at Starbucks (hey..it *had* to be done). The trip didn't take long and we were in Houston before we knew it. We tracked down the arena and double-checked with the box office to see if there were any seats that were closer, but there weren't. This show was gonna be huge.
We decided to go do some shopping and maybe grab some supper before the show. There was a little shopping center close to the arena called "The Woodlands" so we went there, perused Borders (or was it Barnes & Noble? I can't remember now.) for a bit. From there, we headed to some other super-cute shops and prayed the rain clouds on the western horizon would blow past us.
They didn't.
Fortunately, we'd already disappeared inside Jasper's for supper when the brunt of the storm hit. Ahh, Jasper's. What a WONDERFULLY splendid place to eat! I got the ribs (award-winning, I might add), RiceChex got the salmon. We also got calimari for our appetizer and creme brulee for dessert. It was quite possibly the most magnificent meal I've EVER had. HIGHLY recommend it to anyone going to Texas (they've got other locations).
The rain finally died off about the time we finished our meal, so we headed to the car to drop off packages and then head to the arena. Fortunately, the wicked bad storms killed the humidity that had left us both frizzy and sweaty and it was borderline chilly! Texas? July? And we're cold?? And I thought the weather in Iowa was weird.
Anyway....we make our way to our seats.
Clear. The hell over to the right and NOWHERE near the front of the arena, where we've been the last several shows. I'm *NOT* ok with these seats. Neither of us are. But what can ya do. There wasn't anything closer. At least we were there.
When Jabbas came on, I spied the back-up dancers hanging out on the side of the arena watching them. I jumped on the opportunity and asked them if they'd pose for a picture with me. They were all very willing (and I'll tell you now, I wanted to stuff them all in my pocket and take them home to fatten them up - they're SO damn skinny!!) and I got a great picture with them.
I also managed to pin Chris (their drummer) down in the concession area and got a self portrait with him. He's such a sweetie. Love that boy! :)
The concert.....ahh, the concert.
I started crying the minute "Close to You" started in. I promptly lost my contact as a result. So, I watched the entire concert with my right eye (Yeah, the headache was unavoidable.) but it's all good. Almost every song brought tears to my eyes...not knowing when we'd do this again was weighing heavily on our minds, to say the least. It was nice to sit back and just enjoy the show, though. I took fewer pictures than I'd taken at the other shows, so I was able to just take it all in more.
There were some great moments - Cover Girl when Kentucky, Crunchy Kevin & other stage hands sexually assaulted Donnie....Seven Naked Ninjas during Donnie's monologue...Joe coming out in a cape during Tonight, then ripping his shirt open at the end of the song. Crazy stuff, I tell ya!
Lil tip, Princess...I mean seriously? If you're going to go through the work of making a sign, sneaking it into the arena and blocking my view the ENTIRE show, the least you could've done was check your spelling. Jus' sayin.
Uneducated BlockHead aside, the show was pretty fantastic. It was heart-wrenching, though, to see our boys start crying on stage. Joe teared up during "Please, don't go girl" and I thought I was gonna die. But "I'll Be Loving You" was torture. Battery-operated tea-lights lit the arena and every single man on that stage was brought to tears. Jon even had to run off stage to collect himself. The standing ovation was incredible. (Not my video)
RiceChex and I pretty much stayed in tears throughout the rest of the show. We laughed, too, but mostly, we cried. I wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere else that night, though. We also made the decision for any and all future tours, regardless of where the show is, we will be there.
Pictures from Houston (Reminder, please feel free to save off what you want, just give credit where it's due and don't remove my watermark. Thanks!)
When the show ended, RiceChex and I started the long trek home. We made pit stops at several points along the way, our favorite being Buc-ee's - this MASSIVE redneck mecca where their selling points were "The Cleanest Bathrooms in Texas" (they really were!) and something about being the Beaver Nugget Capital of Texas, which is ironic because until I went to Texas, I didn't even realize what a beaver nugget was, much less that IOWA might have one of these capitals. Hmm.
Armed with a bag of beaver nuggets, fresh sodas & some other snacks, we made our way home, pulling in around 6pm on Sunday. Our trip had come to an end.
Now, two months later, we're finally in an emotional spot to be able to watch the videos from the Houston show and not burst into tears (okay, well, we're not sobbing loud enough to attract our neighbors' attention anymore, at least). We've got amazing memories and thousands of pictures and videos (which reminds me...RiceChex, we need to get our videos from whatshername!) to commemorate this trip, which we affectionately nicknamed the "Tits & Wits Tour."
Top 10 Lessons Learned on the Tits & Wits Tour
1. Always double-check your hotel room for belongings (such as killer leather flip-flops) you might have left behind.
2. The license plate game goes on long after the trip has ended.
3. Take time to stop at quirky convenience stores, especially if they claim to have the cleanest bathrooms in the state.
4. Don't drink three giant glasses of tea before you leave on a 12 hr road trip.
5. Make sure to charge your phone battery, have a car charger AND invest in a back-up battery so you don't Tweet yourself into a dead zone too early in the trip.
6. Ogallala, Nebraska is, by far, the hickest town in the nation. I felt smarter upon leaving the city limits.
7. Always find out *exactly* where the group is staying so you don't end up with hotel reservations at more than one hotel per night.
8. By "Jon's Law" you can technically say you slept with a New Kid if you stay at the same hotel.
9. Screaming "SIT DOWN!" at the nutcase in front of you when she's standing on her chair during Jordan's solo, does NOT a clean video make.
10. Spending time with your best friends really IS what the trip is all about - don't squander a moment worrying about all this other shit. You can never get those moments back. Cherish them.
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